Education and What the system Did For Me

"Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” – Albert Einstein


The Education system seems to be a very passionate subject for people. I wanted to give you a peek into my world in hopes that maybe you’ll see it from a different side.

I was diagnosed with ADHD almost 2 years ago. I know that many people believe this a made up problem, but I can assure you it is not. I do believe that far too many children are diagnosed with it when in reality the problem is that they are kinesthetic learners in a world with a lack of educators who don’t know how to engage them. Whether this is really the issue I can’t say but I can now look back on my formal education with a clearer understanding of what I needed vs. what I was given.

I think the number one problem is where the education system places its value. Unless you are in an art school (which there is far too few of) you’ll find the importance on Math, English, Science and History, and at the very bottom are the arts.

The second problem is how we teach children. The school system seems to cater to the visual and auditory learners, but what about the kinesthetic learners, the ones that have to move to think? I know many programs are trying to improve this, but it’s easy to improve something that was almost non-existent.

Then there is the issue that we were not all made to be mediocre at the subjects deemed worthy of importance. A system structured for general knowledge doesn’t allow time for the individuals who were blessed by other gifts to be extraordinary.

I want to be clear that this is my story, somebody with ADHD that is a kinesthetic learner and who is gifted in the performing arts. There are many people with ADHD who learn different ways, like my brother, niece and even Albert Einstein. Not all people are hyper active in their outburst like so many people generalize. Many are hyperactive in the way their brain is always on the go with out the ability to push the break peddle. The creative ability associated with it does not always show itself in performance art. Creativity comes in all forms such as sports, science, math or writing.

From the very beginning I struggled. I was in the lowest reading class, the lowest math class and was even placed in a special program were kids like me went to for some extra help. So from a young age I felt I had been marked with a big x on my forehead that said “I’m the stupid one” and YES, it was embarrassing! There were a few artsy teachers that would have music time or do plays but the kids that got those teachers were the ones that were a bit “brighter”. To me it felt like it was a reward to being smart.

I studied! I didn’t want to be stupid. Who wants that? But regardless of the time and energy I put into studying, when I got my test back, I would cry over another wasted attempt. Many times I was held in from recess to go over missed answers or to finish a test. I know that the system was trying to help me but all their help only made the problem worse. For all its attempts at teaching with the wrong approach it was destroying a love for learning. At a time when a child’s view of themself is shaped by the situation around them, the view of my intelligence was being set in place by the institute that tells us “Do good in school, get good grades and you will be successful in life”.

Middle School and High School weren’t much better. I once asked a question in class and my teacher responded with, “Seriously are you that stupid?” She never gave me the answer and as I held the tears in, I vowed never to ask another question. I know everyone has their off days, teachers included, but her statement solidified what I felt for so long. It was said in a room full of kids that I grew up with, and for 13 years every test score, every class ranking, and every system that divided our intellectual abilities found me lacking.

Because of the education system I believed myself to be stupid. If it weren’t for my parents reiterating to me that I was gifted in so many other ways, I’m sure I would have shriveled up. Unfortunately I think many kids have fallen prey to believing this barbaric interpretation of what is smart and many are not given a chance to find their gift.

We are all born with the ability to be creative but an upside to ADHD is that we excel creatively. Studies have shown that the performing arts in particular. I’m not sure how accurate that is considering the characteristics that manifest through an artist are more visual then somebody whose creative abilities lie in a more introverted subject like math or writing. I fall into the group of performing arts. This is the place were we are free to be us, the place were we can release our inhibitions. The place were we finally have the upper hand because we do not have this mental block of what is the right answer, because to us we see endless possibilities. But what the system has done is placed the arts at the bottom of what is considered important. This leads many to believe that what we have to offer has no value.

The moment I was diagnosed with ADHD it was like all this garbage that I didn’t realize I had been carrying around was finally disposed of. The lie I believed of being stupid, which I had come to accept in so many ways, couldn’t be further from the truth. My brain can find lots of ways to interpret a question or to see multiple answers to a question, even find different ways to come to my answer; this is something I had to defend and explain to my teachers. Now I’m learning this is to be considered genius? (Excuse me while I try to digest this, I’m still coming to terms with the fact I’m not stupid)

I don’t think I could ever put myself in the same category as genius. Average is nice and I like it there. The word genius conjures up negative feelings of the kids that got all the praise and rewards for something that came easy to them. The people I still find myself measured to. Regardless of my understanding of myself, I will probably struggle with my ability to communicate with these linear thinkers for a long time. Until the moment I discover somebody has some artistic gift or at least a deep appreciation for the arts, I can’t fully relax or be myself.

I do believe the school system has its place. There are many that are truly benefited by its factory style approach. But this ridged approach will never give someone with ADHD a chance to optimize their learning potential and let them fully comprehend or see things a bit deeper then a linear thinker would. Because of this set schedule, most people will never be aware of this unique function that can be both a good and bad thing. It’s the ability to hyper focus, and because it is not given a chance in a school setting people will go on having ignorant assumptions that we all have learning disorders (I’ll save that for another post)

The best chance a child with ADHD has for the future is for a parent or adult to recognize the child’s learning style, strengths and weaknesses and give them the opportunity to thrive while giving them value and worth. Then we can help the child learn to use their unique abilities in a positive way.

They say ignorance is bliss. Sometimes I wish I were ignorant.

Part 1

I love to watch a great ballet performed by dancers that truly know their craft. I love the moments when you lean forward in your seat, eyes riveted on the stage, and you hold your breath for fear you might miss something. I wish I had more of these moments.


When I go to the ballet, I find myself seeing all the mistakes rather then just seeing the beauty behind it. I know that dancer's work hard, and I know nobody is perfect. But I can't stop my mental list. It reads much like a directors notes at the final dress rehearsal. Believe me, I wish I could see past all the mistakes, but I can't. Not pointing their toes, not using turn out. That person is late, that person is early. Some parts I wouldn't be able to tell you what needs to be fixed, because all I know is that it looks unclean and wrong. For the record, I don't even like to watch myself dance.


For all the years I've danced, and the countless teachers I've had, I have had one major issue with it all. The lack of consistency. Each teacher has a different answer, a different way to execute a move, or a different take on what the ballet term means. What is the right way? I want the answer, not 20 different opinions of how it should be. The worst was when a teacher would give you a "trick", or way of cheating your way through a move.


I've dreamed of being a dance teacher since I was young. I love teaching! I've been blessed by the opportunities I've had to perform, but teaching is were my heart is. I love creative movement, pre-ballet, jazz and hip hop, but the one thing I was always asked is, "will you teach my child ballet?".


To be completely honest, I would love to teach older kids ballet, but it scares me.

There are hundreds of rules, and thousands of details in ballet. Something done wrong can cause an injury. The problem was that I didn't have the answers I wanted, and I didn't want to teach it wrong.

When I was pregnant with my girls I had a lot of time to think about this. I wasn't teaching anymore and knew that with twins, it was going to be awhile before I started again. But what I did know was that I was going to come back as a better teacher. I researched certifications programs (something not required in the US). I spend a lot of time reading and researching all the methods, watching hours of video's looking at their strengths and weaknesses. I was looking for answers to my questions

Applying music, math and the value of a dollar

I think every parent wants to give their child the desires of their hearts. But in just handing our children those desires, what lesson does that teach them?

Last spring, I took the girls to a dance supply store to find Estee some tap ties for her used tap shoes we found at the consignment store. While we were there, it happened. You know, that moment when you lock eyes on something and violins start playing and you're magically transformed into a dream sequence. The girls spotted these music boxes that, when opened, music plays and the ballerina twirls. That's when my mommy mind got inspired.

I wanted a way for the girls to earn those music boxes. So we started our good choice dollar system. I have a stack of fake money, and when I notice the girls make a good choice or do something extra kind for someone, I would reward them with a fake dollar. It wasn't for every good choice, because I didn’t want them doing it for the dollar, so I would only give them randomly. It took them almost 5 months to earn enough money(because the value of mommy currency isn't as great as the US). At one point, when they went to visit their music boxes at the store, I offered to just buy them. They were so close to earning them, and I really didn't want to have to leave the house on another shopping trip with them. But they refused. They wanted to finish earning them. As stressful as the thought of having to take the girls on another shopping trip sounded, I was even more proud of them for having the desire to earn them. It was a big deal the day they went to buy those music boxes! They still carry them around the house and proudly display them on their dresser.

Now that they are almost 4, we have added chores and music to our system.

I have a list of chores for the girls. From making their bed, to scrubbing spots of the kitchen floor, to folding and putting away laundry. Each chore is worth a different type of note: quarter note, half note or whole note. For each measure of music earned, they receive a good choice dollar. Every evening we look at our staff of music and practice counting and clapping the rhythm out. We have not mastered it yet, but with practice and patience it will come.

There are other ways to earn notes as well. They are given a set of flash cards to memorize each week.

We still randomly reward acts of kindness as well. For example, when Coppelia wanted to wear her favorite Rapunzel nightgown, but it was in the wash, Estee so sweetly offered to let her wear her very special Snow White gown to bed. That act of kindness earned her a whole note (worth a good choice dollar).

They can also earn notes by successfully getting through the flashcards we have set out for the week. But the big one, the one that gets them 2 whole notes is when they have memorized their bible verse. This week it is John 3:16.

At the end of the week, I set up the mommy store. In the store, I have items that I know they want and will actually get played with. My sister-in-law did Mommy store and gave me the wonderful idea of a weekly specials, like an ice cream date with Daddy.

Who am I and what makes me special

I was raised by my Pastor Father and my mother. My mother is a gifted pianist who began composing as a young girl. She has the ability to sit down and play any sheet music you put in front of her but also to play by ear. When my mother plays she plays with her whole heart and when she lifts her voice to worship, peace would fill the home and the presence of the Lord could be felt. My mother taught me to worship and to give everything I have to him she is a shining example of this: What a crime that would have been if she had locket that talent in a closet.

I know my mother secretly had a dream to own her own bus and turn her children into her own version of the Partridge family but the most important thing to her was to give us an outlet to express ourselves. So for years everyday after school we sat with her at the piano and had our lessons. There were times I loved it and there were times I hated it. “It’s hard.” “It’s boring.” “I don’t want to.” I’m sure all excuse heard by a parent and those same ones where coming from my mouth. Then there was that moment when everything started clicked and I pulled out a piece of sheet music and began to play and the joy I experienced in playing each measure was great.

I never became a pianist or a member of the Partridge family but I did learn so much more then just a skill. To some people they would brush this under a rug and not see its value but to other they see a skill that can be used in many facets of life.

The skills she was instilling in me are invaluable. She taught me musicality, disciplined, to work hard and set goals but most important how to express myself through my art. All of these things were very important to me because I was blessed with another talent, the gift of dance.


In Psalms 139 it says this;

You created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. How Precious to me are your thoughts God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand. When I awake I am still with you.

God didn’t just pull out a big mixing pot and throw in a few talents for good measure. NO! He saw my unformed body and said this one is going to dance. This one will feel bubbles rising up through her soul and as they come forth from her body, with everything that is within her she will dance! Then he looked at every day of my life and gave those steps a meaning a purpose. I will never fully understand why it was important to make me dance but I do know this. His works are Wonderful and I will praise him because I am fearfully and wonderfully made!

I am the mom of two adorable and energetic twin girls and they are my insperations for this blog. My goal is to teach my children the importance of having an artistic outlet and give them a way to express themselves. I’m not planning to be a crazy dance mom and live vicariously through my children turning them into prima ballerinas but I do see how dance and music have helped me in life. As a parent I am also a teacher and I want to teach my children everything I can. Dance is my art, it’s the way I express myself and the way I worship. What kind of parent would I be if I didn’t take the time to teach my children something that is so important to me. I want to give my girls this special gift, the gift of dance.